Grocery Store Anger/Want To Leave

Dream Notes: 

• guy at grocery store stole things from cart- pack of candy?
• ending up angry at him, asking  how he would like it if I stole things out of his cart... there were three of them together- I assume friends. I started yelling at all three and throwing things from my cart at them...then they threw items back at me and were coming closer- at some point they threw things at me that I caught and I said something to them like - "giving me weapons" and I threw them back - even more aggressively than before...woke up shortly after this
• B Newr.was in dream- kept messing with me- I think I was trying to get away from him. I think I had feelings for him too but he was a jerk (like real life!)... I think he would look at my clothes and maybe wanted me to change? I don't remember how he was toying with me but I remember feeling annoyed
• Wanted to go on trip to Fairmont or Braxton- asked "mom" (wasn't real mom) and she was ok with it. B said he would go with me but I didn't want him to and I think I was trying to figure out a way to go without him. In dream, I knew there was no reason for me to go to Braxton since family no longer there (real) and decided on Fairmont because it was closer and could go shopping. I wanted to go to Braxton though to escape. 
• Kept changing clothes- jeans were too tight
• I was younger in dream
• There was tons of food in the kitchen...donations? or bought in from stores? Maybe it was for a holiday?
• Sleeping near window- maybe on the floor- the window was foggy and had finger drawings on it, could see a large foggy river or some body of water outside.

Dream symbols: 

Images: food/groceries, known person from my past, unknown mother- she was younger and blonde, unknown men- likely college age, foggy/grey water, jeans/clothes

Colors: white wall by window, blue/grey water

Feelings: yearning to leave, to escape, annoyed and hurt, angry

Actions:  shopping in a grocery store, asking if I could take a trip

My Thoughts:  The overall feeling was frustation and wanted to escape. This lines up with real life. The boys and B.Newr basically made me feel trapped and kept hurting me- my fear that it will always be as it always has. 

Notes: n/a

Real Life:  B.Newr. was a manager at a coffee shop I once worked for- he was a bit of a narcissist that would be nice to you one day and not the next. I always walked on eggshells around him.  I have not seen nor thought about him in a very long time but I have thought about a girl that I used to work with there- she dated someone I used to care for but could not have. I wonder if B. was just an offshoot of her since that has been on my mind lately. The feeling of wanting to get away is real. I day dream about moving and am always looking for a place to finally go to-  knowing I am trapped here right now. 

migraine dream and does he actually care?

My dream has mostly faded at the time I am writing this but I wanted to note some main points. I was sitting in the upper deck of a set of bleachers- ones you might find in a high school auditorium. I had a migraine and was rubbing my forehead with my head down. I eventually pulled a pink ballcap down further on my head to help block out light. The person next to me gave me a hug and the person behind me did as well. When I looked around, it was a boy from high school and I mentioned that I was surprised he remembered me- even though he looked as he did in school. This is where the dream gets blurry-but I did note that I was naked at some point...and realized that I was either wrapped up in towels or a blanket. I remember feeling uncomfortable about the idea of standing up and mad that I didn't get dressed!  I don't remember too many details of what I was doing but there was a guy that was seemingly trying to make me happy. There were a few moments with other people but most details escape me now other than having a talk with one girl about why we hadn't talked in a while. I think she might have represented a real person from my life. The guy, he was tall with dark hair, maybe light eyes. I had a feeling that maybe he "liked" me as he had become affectionate throughout the "scenes"... Toward the end, I walked into a dining room and he was working on something with his back to me--- when he turned, I tried to hug him and he hesitated as if he didn't want to- but then went ahead, kissed my neck and the kissed my mouth. Out of the corner of my eye- I could see a couple of his friends coming into the dining area. I realized at that point that he was probably not interested in me at all and was playing up to his friends. I decided to leave- I think he had made plans with me for later so I left...and I think I decided to wander away and "test" him- basically see if he cared if I disappeared...  I found myself in an odd place- with an open floor plan- part boutique, part bank- maybe an airport... it was strange but nice. I kept looking at my phone, expecting to hear from him but never did. When I finally returned to where I might meet him, I couldn't find him... as I was walking past a group of people, I felt like they knew what was going on but I kept walking. At some point, they yelled to me "horses! horses!"... which makes sense considering what was going on in my real life but it was almost like they were reminding me where he was... Also, I think I did see my reflection in a cell phone while I was sitting in the bleachers. I vaguely remember wanting to know what I looked like with the ball cap on. I do remember a scene with the guy in an upstairs apartment ... I mainly remember the stairs- from the outside but the rest of the details have been forgotten now.

Dream symbols:

Images:  pink baseball hat, bleachers, couple people I might know in real life, dining table, odd shopping center, tall brunette man, boutique clothes, set of stairs, gathering of people

Colors: the pink from the ballcap really stands out to me

Feelings: it was interesting---I felt intrigued by the guy and wondering why he was trying to make me happy- but then when he didn't seem to want to embrace me later, I felt rejected and then like he was playing me once he went ahead and did so. It left me feeling stupid. 

Actions: sitting in the bleachers, dealing with a migraine and then roaming around with the guy, also, confronting my friend about not talking in a while...

My Thoughts: This one is pretty loaded- naked with towels wrapped around me... I guess this generally means insecurity and fear. The migraine was actually real! I woke up with one! The guy- and his eventual rejection- this is a common thing in my life anyway--- but part of me feels like he represents a person at work-esp. with trying to make me happy since that was mentioned recently. The rejection- also probably related to the same--- maybe the less than the enthusiastic thing. The girl- I think she popped up because there is a friend I haven't talked to in almost a year now that I really didn't have closure with...or even really know what happened. The place I was in- probably related to the new bank account I just opened... and lastly, the horses- there was something in the news recently about this- related to someone I know...so that is obviously where that came from. 

Notes: n/a

Real Life:  As noted...I did wake up to a migraine and some of these things are a reality as mentioned... 

crossing a creek and this coffee shop

There was definitely more to my dreaming but this scene stands out the most now. 

I was walking along a trail at times trying to ride a motorcycle (even though I couldn't ride- and can't in real life either- I never learned to ride a bike in general!) and at times, I was just walking. I eventually made it to a strange bridge that had very steep stairs going up, then the bridge, then another set of stairs going down. It was over a creek and now I wonder why considering I could have waded through it. I think I had four German Shepherds with me. I may have been carrying one and I was trying to get them to learn how to take the stairs... I had two adult shepherds trying to go up and down but they were very scared, I think I was holding one puppy as mentioned and the other puppy may have been behind me. This is really all I can remember right now. I will add more if I remember my dream later. 

Later- there was also a scene where I possibly worked at a coffee shop that also served deserts. I don't remember too many details but I remember thinking that this place didn't sell too many of either and I was always worried about messing up the orders. There were people around but "no one" that stands out...maybe just customers but they are all hazy. 

Dream symbols:

Images:  creek (again!),  stairs, bridge (tall and narrow), German Shepherds-adult and puppy,  barista machinery, desert machinery (both are hazy)

Colors: no colors really stand out but maybe green and brown

Feelings: trying to encourage the dogs to go up the stairs and not be scared, in the coffee shop scene- thinking about making mistakes and relieved we didn't sell/make much

Actions: moving slowly up the stairs with a scared dog on a bottom rung, maybe holding another dog, in the coffee shop- I don't remember doing anything other than observing- but it's all hazy as mentioned

My Thoughts: It's interesting that I dreamed of a creek/water two days in a row. I will interpret that as a need to change, or fear of drowning/getting wet, even though there is a very little (like the house flooding- why was this part of the house built there?) ...and the odd bridge I was trying to cross even though I didn't have to. The stairs and narrow bridge- along with the dogs... and my struggle to get them over their fears- they might relate to my own fears and struggles to get ahead- even though the answers/solutions might be easily resolved if I keep taking one step at a time. The dogs might relate to my self- hinderance...and different stages of those fears...  the dogs could have also waded through the creek... so I was carrying them and myself up these stairs for no reason. Maybe I should look around and see how silly this all is and just walk across the creek without a struggle. Wouldn't it be better to teach them to not fear the gently rushing water than try to walk up a clumsy set of stairs and be up high? I think I make my problems more than they need to be! 

As for the ice cream shop- my relief of little orders of coffee/ice cream and my fear of making mistakes- I interpret this as maybe a desire to not deal with my problems. In real life, I have worked at a small restaurant and as a barista- these things are not hard to make. But I think this is really about not wanting to deal with my problems. 

Notes: I have dreamed of working in a coffee/dessert shop a few other times before... and either had a really hard time keeping up with customers or I was looking for a job there or working- but no one was there- not even coworkers. 

Real Life:  I work in a veterinary clinic so I do see shepherds on a regular basis. I grew up with a creek in our backyard (down a field) and as mentioned, worked in a couple of coffee shops. I also have a wooden staircase (3 floors) to get up to my apartment. 

nap dream, forest creek sunroom

I took about a 2-hour nap after not feeling well this evening (ate too much at a restaurant) and I dreamed the following:

I was trying to get to a house but to get to it, you had to walk along a ledge of rocks and wooden boards that were not steady. I am not sure what was below (if there were even rocks because I didn't look down) but there was really no way around it. I don’t remember going in but at some point, I was inside maybe a sunroom and I proclaimed to someone that the house was mine. The room was  painted forest green with white trim and there were a few couches or chairs and bookcases- with books of course- the house was half sitting over a creek and from the windows, you could see a bridge or culvert where the water came over, up to the house and then I"m guessing it went below the house. I remember telling them (?) that I didn’t plan on staying forever because of possible flooding there but the house was really pretty from where I was standing- with the green paint against the autumn colors of green and golds seen through the windows.

There was also a scene where I was singing, I believe …a really pretty song- like I was performing…but I can’t remember the context of it all now. I vaguely remember the night sky? Maybe the stars? It has slipped my mind at this point. I did end up back on the ledge I think, trying to get back to the house- and I remember that I had to stack up those wooden boards to hold onto as I inched my way back. The boards were wobbly too and I was mildly afraid that I would fall. 

Dream symbols:

Images:  small sunroom with bookshelves, windows, creek with rushing water toward the house, strange walkup to get to the house, autumn- forest trees

Colors: forest green, autumn gold leaves, white trim

Feelings: uncertain, possibly danger of falling, in awe of how house colors blended with the environment, disappointed that I lived there due to the risk of flooding, feeling ashamed

Actions: singing? (vague), walking across strange walkway/ledge, speaking to people (unseen), reasoning with them about why I wouldn't stay

My Thoughts: The only thing I can really think of is that the water passing under the house- with the realization that it might flood at some point- combined with the odd precarious way to enter the house- relates to my uncertainty and unease with my life. I feel like I'm on the edge of being in trouble all the time (financially mostly)... and I feel like life is chaotic right now. I definitely feel ashamed that I am not where I could be now had I done things the right way.  I think the beauty I saw- with the room and autumn view on the outside- may be my internal longing for peace...and something new---to go somewhere else... it stopped me in my tracks when I stopped to take it in... and I felt disappointed that I couldn't stay when I realized that flooding was likely to occur there. I think I know that I must make changes soon or will end up regretting. I can't keep living like I am.

Notes: There were other parts of this dream that escape me now- like with the singing and other parts of the house and people but it's all faded now. This is just the main story that has stuck with me.

Real Life:  I spend a lot of time looking at houses online at Zillow and love interior design. I also daydream about living in the country-away from others. I loved to sing as a child and loved music. There was a creek that ran on our property when I was young.